Exciting things are happening! Members of the Launch Team recently got their first look at Sacred Balance in its final (digital) form. Be on the lookout for their feedback and reviews as we get closer to the May 20th release.
Speaking of May 20th, I’m organizing a Virtual Launch Party! I can’t wait to celebrate the release of Sacred Balance with all of you. We’ll have a Q&A session, free giveaways, and a guided spiritual practice! Mark your calendars for Tuesday, May 20th! Registration details to come.
Thoughts on Preparation
This has been a season of preparation for me. I’m preparing for the launch of Sacred Balance, of course, but I’m also in Master’s program preparing myself to get licensed as a Professional Counselor. I’m imagining possibilities for my vocational future and trying to discern what steps I can take now to move toward those options. All this preparing comes with a complex blend of emotions. I feel excited, impatient, nervous, frustrated, unsure, confident, and hopeful all in varying combinations from one day to the next. I have idealistic visions of what my life could look like, but I also imagine all the roadblocks I may encounter along the way. Sometimes I want time to speed up so I can see what the future holds, but other moments I want to hit the brakes and give myself time to figure things out. Preparing requires a delicate balance between focusing on the future and remaining grounded here and now.
Not all preparing is helpful or effective. There’s a skill I teach patients at the hospital called “Coping Ahead.”[1] It involves imagining a difficult scenario before it happens and making a plan to navigate it successfully. The key to this skill is picturing the situation as if it’s really happening. You want to visualize yourself following your plan and being successful. Essentially, you give your brain a roadmap so when the scenario really happens you have a higher chance of responding effectively. The biggest mistake I see when people try to practice this skill is falling into the what ifs. I’m certainly guilty of this myself. Instead of imagining myself being successful, I start ruminating on all the things that could possibly go wrong. The psychological term for this is catastrophizing, and it contributes to anxiety and stress. It actually primes our brains to see the worst in a situation, making it hard to recognize opportunities for positive change.
I can’t help but think about this difference between coping ahead and catastrophizing when I look at our current political climate. People are feeling legitimately scared about what the future holds. There’s a whole sub-culture of “preppers” who make plans and stockpile supplies in case of a catastrophic change to our society. Meanwhile, others feel frozen and helpless with no clear sense of what to do next. I can understand both instincts, but I worry that they both run the risk of pushing us further into anxiety and fear. Ruminating over the what ifs doesn’t effectively prepare us to respond in helpful ways. Instead, could we start visualizing concrete steps we can take to care for ourselves and others? Could we be realistic about the possible challenges ahead and prepare ourselves to respond effectively? Could we find a balance between the future and the present moment that will help us to prepare well?
Fittingly, we’ve just entered the Christian season of Lent, a season all about preparation. These 40 days (plus Sundays) focus on the reality of suffering and death in our lives. Christian worship services will recount the challenges and conflicts that Jesus faced throughout his ministry, culminating with the story of his death on Good Friday. But that’s not where it ends. Lent continues until Easter morning—a celebration of the power of love overcoming fear and hatred. That is the future we look toward throughout Lent. Without that goal in sight, all the focus on suffering and death is just catastrophizing. Lent invites reflection on the darker realities of life because they are real challenges we all face. The goal is to face them and prepare ourselves effectively. Lent is not about despair, it’s about finding a deep, resilient hope that can handle whatever life throws at us..
Hope is the crucial ingredient for our preparations. Without it, we are ruled by fear. We need the grand visions of what our lives and our world could be. They are not just empty fantasies. They are a roadmap. We can’t lose sight of the real-life obstacles, but we must also train our minds to find effective ways forward. In the spirit of “coping ahead,” I offer the following guided reflection practice. Please use it as it serves you and feel free to share with credit to me.
[1] This skill is part of Dialectical Behavioral Therapy, a treatment developed by Marsha Linehan for people with emotion dysregulation.
Preparing Well
A Guided Reflection Practice
This is a flexible practice. You can use the questions below as journal prompts, discussion starters in a group setting, or simply food for thought.
Identify a future situation you’re worried about facing. It helps to be as specific and detailed as possible to help your imagination engage. Be honest about the challenges, but try to avoid getting sucked into all the what ifs.
What do you find most challenging about this scenario?
What realistic barriers might you face?
What would the best-case scenario look like? How do you hope it turns out?
What factors might influence the outcome one way or another?
How might God invite you to engage with the situation?
What tools and strategies could help you be effective?
What personal values can guide your response?
What sources of support are available to you?
Take a moment to visualize the situation, moving yourself through it in the most effective way that you can. Tap into your hope and let that fuel your choices.
Imagine yourself responding in ways that embody your goals and values.
Repeat this visualization several times to give your mind a clear roadmap of how you’d like to respond.
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